In the past five years, a new classroom management strategy has taken hold.
The goal of this strategy is to calm and soothe the fragile psyches of the most difficult students.
The way it works is that whenever they begin to feel overwhelmed, angry, frustrated, or excitable (i.e. for any reason they wish), they may leave the classroom.
In many cases, there is a designated cooling off room they can go to.
Staffed with an aide or counselor, they chill out on bean bag chairs eating animal crackers, playing with stuffed toys, or staring at an iPad. In other cases, they roam the halls unfettered.
It’s a terrible idea because allowing mental breaks very effectively tells them . . .
They’re not good enough.
Why else would they be given the opportunity to avoid dealing with their emotions unless there was something wrong with them?
By saying ‘You can go to this special place whenever you need to’ you’re giving them proof from an authoritative source that they can’t control themselves. This is a devastating message.
It all but guarantees that they’ll never improve. In fact, it provides a ready-made excuse to misbehave and throw tantrums with greater frequency.
They can walk away from responsibilities.
Is the math too hard? Does writing an essay feel mentally taxing or frustrating? Is another student annoying? Then flee. Pull the escape hatch on your life and the problem goes away.
But having this option is ruinous for them and their future. Besides losing out on learning, they become mentally weak.
They become experts at passing the buck and evading responsibility. Thus, it’s never their fault. Everything is outside of their locus of control. They become perpetual victims and eventually very unhappy people.
They fall far behind.
Once you’ve proven to a student by letting them off the hook that they don’t measure up—which is the unmistakable message that settles deep into their subconscious—it’s very difficult to reverse. You’ve set a prophetic course few will ever alter.
With each passing month (and year), this belief they have about themselves becomes more and more ingrained. And they fall further and further behind academically and emotionally.
Sadly, it isn’t even based on reality. It’s a false perception others have foisted upon them. The only way out is a life-altering event or a teacher, coach, or adult who says “No! It’s not true. I see something in you.”
Who Really Benefits
Mental breaks don’t benefit the student. They benefit the teacher who can get them out of the classroom.
They benefit the principal who can say they’re doing something to help.
They benefit the counselor and behavior specialist who can pretend that because the student leaves instead of misbehaving, they’re good at their job.
So we pass Jeremy or Jasmine along from one grade to the next, appeasing and coddling them until they’re long forgotten. Until the inevitability of reality finally strikes at 18 or 20 years of age.
When it hits them.
It was all a lie.
PS – Be sure to subscribe to our YouTube channel. The latest video is How to Handle Aggressively Disrespectful Students.
Also, if you haven’t done so already, please join us. It’s free! Click here and begin receiving classroom management articles like this one in your email box every week.