As I write this, I’m staying overnight in the Phoenix airport. My flight was diverted mid-flight on the way home to San Diego because a plane was stuck on the finest city’s one and only runway.
So 238 of us are trying to get some sleep before our rescheduled 5am departure.
If this has ever happened to you, then you know how hard it is to nod off amidst the cleaning crew’s toils and blaring announcements over the intercom.
To make matters worse, there is a power hungry security guard that won’t let anyone curl up in a comfortable spot.
He’s decided, for reasons that certainly go back to his childhood, that no one on his watch will be allowed on any soft surfaces, including restaurant booths, padded benches, or soft chairs.
We must stay on the carpet-covered concrete floor or sit in a proper gate chair. Why? Well, while being rousted from my stupor, I asked him. His answer: “Because I’m the security guard and you don’t need to know.”
In other words, it was arbitrary. This, of course, infuriated the horde, who one after the other trudged back to the gate muttering indecents under their breath.
It’s a perfectly normal and valid response, with your students too.
If you don’t have a compelling reason why you do, well, everything—though especially your rules, expectations, and policies—then you shouldn’t do it.
Because otherwise you’re going to create a cauldron of resentment, a bubbling brew of seething directed at you. The result is skyrocketing disrespect, misbehavior behind your back, and determination not to do anything to please you.
So what is a compelling reason? Whatever is best for students, which then must be explained to them in a way they understand.
We all want to know why.
If the security guard was able to explain that the airport’s soft surfaces were prone to spontaneous combustion, then the passengers would have thanked him. He would have been looking out for what is best for them.
It’s the same with students. They’ll accept, and often eagerly buy-in, to whatever you’re selling when you explain why.
They relax and focus contently when they trust that what you ask of them is for them and their benefit, not for you or your power trip.
The result is better motivation and a more influential relationship with your class.
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I’m a sub and one of my rules is don’t sit in anything but a chair. In other words, I don’t want them perching on desks and tables, nor sitting on top of a windowsill. It’s because when I first started subbing a student did this and the desk broke, causing them to fall. The student was okay but I explain, these floors are hard, and God forbid somebody falls and hits their head. That is enough for most of them to sit in a safer seat. I usually have an explanation for every boundary. It is short and to the point. And if the student says, I do this at home…my response is do your parents also have 30 kids at your house? If no, then the rules have to be a little different here. It gets a laugh, and you start building connections. I had a class of 30 freshmen yesterday on a Friday afternoon, and they were great! I laid out all my expectations beforehand and that was it.
I haven’t commented on a post in a while, but this one speaks to me! I am a firm believer that students are people. I know this sounds basic.
What I mean is that they are intelligent beings no matter what their age. Adults tend to disregard their need for knowledge.
Do they need to know everything? Absolutely not! But brief, honest explanations go a long way to soothe their curiosities and fears of the unknown. This is very simple to do by connecting to four basic concepts: Stay safe, Own our school, Act responsibly, Respect others. When a student asks “why” I start with one of those and add whatever quick detail supports the chosen concepts. This even would have worked for Michael’s airport scenario!
I like this process because it shows students that I trust them with my knowledge. And later in the year I can even flip it on them and have them tell me why as certain 2nd grade students are so familiar with the process that they know what to expect!
Always explain why – works everytime. Magic also happens as a relief teacher.
Love your work and follow as best as I can.
Thank you
I had students that did not want to take the lockdowns seriously. When I gave the WHY behind it, I have not had an issues since. I have a personal experience with this that I shared parts of it with my students. My daughter was on the campus of UVA when there was an active shooter. Sadly three basketball players lost their lives that day. I teach elementary school, so I didn’t talk about the loss of life. I did say my daughter and other students were in lockdown and did not know where the shooter was and it was a very scary time for all the students, until he was found. I talked about how I felt as a mother getting the call that my daughter was in lockdown due to an active shooter and that they had no idea where he was on the campus at that time. I agree that if they know the why they tend to comply with the rules better and take them more seriously.
Dear Michael,
I just wanted to tell you that I really appreciate the fact that although you are now turning our attention to your Youtube channel, you are still writing these refesching weekly articles, that are quick to read and always inspiring. So that I wanted to encourage you to not give up this way of communicating your thoughts as I don’t always have the time to watch a 20 minute video.
Best regards,
Andrea Benguigui
Will do, Andrea. The articles will always be my first priority.
I totally agree!
When I explain my three simple classroom rules, I explain the reason for them: they are designed to make you successful in my classroom. That is my first objective, for you to be successful.
As a sub, I firmly agree, with the only exception being the case of the “wise guy” or “wise gal” student who already knows “why” but tries to get into an endless “why” loop over a basic classroom rule that already has firmly been established by the regular teacher, such as seating charts or no food or no video games during silent reading.
By the way, Michael— yes— the finest city!— I lived in North County for over twenty years and began my post-retirement wonderful subbing career in some great school districts in the San Diego area!
Reminds me of the bit with Saxifrage Russel (from Red Mars) being put in the role of teacher – the kids would often lead him down the garden path with an endless series of ‘whys’ and he would always end up in the same place: “Because that’s how the rules of physics percolated out from the Big Bang.”
That answer works great with kids who start you down that garden path, because they know there’s not a rational ‘why’ at the end.
You have used this relatable and somewhat humorous travel mishap to illustrate an important principle in teaching: rules and expectations must have a clear, student-centered purpose. You effectively connects the frustration caused by arbitrary authority at the airport to the classroom environment, highlighting how lack of explanation breeds resentment and disengagement. The analogy reinforces that transparency and rationale build trust, motivation, and respect—key elements in fostering a positive learning atmosphere.
Okay. I LAUGHED OUT LOUD with this article. So true. Ha! So sorry for you rough flight, Michael!
They should have put you up in hotels and money for food. Did you get any compensation?