It’s so easy to do.
One of your smart, capable, polite, well-groomed, athletic, and/or charismatic students accidentally and ever-so-briefly breaks a class rule, and you smile and give them a gentle reminder.
You trust them, after all. It was a mistake, after all. They get it, after all. What’s the harm?
Well, let’s see . . .
The Rest
What about the rest of the students? What do they think when they see you let a select one or two perfects off the hook?
Oh, they notice. Don’t think they don’t. In most cases, they just watch and roll their eyes inwardly. Because they’re used to it. It’s commonplace, just another school day.
But each time it happens their resentment deepens. Their indifference solidifies. They start to believe that the system is rigged against them. So why bother? Or, better yet, why not give the teacher the misbehavior they expect?
Furthermore, if the teacher can’t be trusted to consistently follow their own classroom rules and consequences—that they make such a big deal about—then can anything else they say be trusted?
The Select
When you’re treated as special because of your looks, athletic ability, intelligence, or any other reason, it’s human nature to start believing that you’re better-than.
You need a solid familial support system to keep you grounded, which many students don’t have.
This is a dangerous place to be that sets these students up for a terrible fall when they inevitably realize that there are scores of people more talented than them.
In the meantime, it becomes difficult to avoid looking down your nose at others. The temptation to be a mean girl, a bully, an arrogant jock, a have rather than a have-not is too great.
You’re a big fish for years and years until one day life smacks you in the face and people no longer cater to you anymore, or even glance in your direction. Many, many never recover from the fall.
The Teacher
If you care about kids, you must do the hard thing.
You must be mentally strong enough to enforce consequences consistently and equally. You are in a unique position to bring reality and fairness to your little classroom world.
You can help The Rest start feeling like valued members of your class like everyone else. You can prove to them that there are people they can trust and that opportunity is available for them too.
Personally, I worry about The Select even more.
Most assuredly, they will not become a YouTube star. They’re not going to be a professional athlete. They won’t be a tech billionaire. Many will fall off the face of the earth after high school.
You are in position to help both groups see reality.
To lift one group into recognizing their own talents and abilities that are so needed in this hurting world. To bring another group into a healthy and humble appreciation for their gifts and how they can harness and direct them for good.
Or you can play a part in the destruction of both.
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