This may be one of the easiest strategies we’ve ever covered here at SCM.
It may also be the most powerful.
But first, some context.
Right or wrong, today’s students have less freedom than in decades past.
Generally speaking, their lives are more controlled, organized, and edited.
They receive more direction and structure.
They make fewer decisions of their own and are rarely given time and space to explore and create without someone looking over their shoulder.
The natural fallout, among other reasons, is a rise in immaturity and dependency.
Content aside, teaching a ninth grade class today in many ways feels similar to sixth grade just ten years ago.
The current trend toward more individualized instruction, as well as the pressure on teachers to always be helping, has only added to the problem.
All the guiding, advising, directing, and micromanaging very effectively weakens our students’ internal self-starter mechanism. It paralyzes their imagination, creativity, and ability to visualize, set, and attain their own goals.
It teaches them to be helpless.
Most tragic, in many ways students today have lost their ability to play—or to even know how to play.
This is a topic we’ve addressed in great length here at SCM, as well as in our books. We’ve been extolling the benefits of freedom within boundaries to improve behavior and learning since Dream Class came out in 2009.
We’ve also covered the supreme importance of independent (including group) work and how critical it is to be hesitant, even reluctant, to reteach individual students what was taught to the entire class just minutes before.
The truth is, as a classroom teacher, there is a lot you can do to instill greater independence and maturity. In fact, with one simple tweak, you can increase it tenfold.
You can create a class that is unrecognizable in their level of competence, autonomy, and motivation from those of your colleagues.
If you’re a longtime reader of SCM, then you know that all of what we do here, our entire approach, is designed to produce well-behaved, mature, and independent students.
However, there is a critical strategy, or rule of thumb, that I’ve mentioned only in passing that may very well be the single most important key to changing the culture of your classroom—from grabby and needy to fiercely capable.
It’s something you respect and adhere to in all situations and at all times to ensure that you’re supporting and encouraging these critical success skills.
So what is it?
It is this: Whenever your students are doing what you want, asked of them, or expected—no matter what it is—leave them alone. As much as possible, you want to disappear, become a fly on the wall, and just observe.
It’s okay that your students know you’re there, but otherwise you should fade into the background and outside of their immediate awareness.
The moment they begin giving you what you want, don’t step in to praise or encourage. Don’t narrate, remind, or rehash. Don’t kneel down and ask questions or offer hints and clues. Don’t even acknowledge.
Never, ever interfere with success.
Instead, allow your students to wallow in it. Let them feel it and relish it and become lost in their own purposefulness.
It doesn’t matter whether it’s a routine, activity, lesson, task, assignment, or free-play. After you’ve given clear instruction and checked for understanding, turn them loose to do the work, complete the mission, solve for x, play the game, etc.
Let them think, build, discuss, create, and overcome without you.
The idea is for them to forget that you’re even there, to rely on themselves and their classmates, and to carry the full weight of responsibility—which feels good and empowers them with the ability to know how to learn and succeed no matter the obstacles.
In such an environment, supported by excellent instruction, students of all ages thrive.
They acquire a love of learning, a pride and confidence in doing what so many adults, through their attitudes, actions, and micromanagement, have communicated loud and clear that they could not do.
In this way, you make a can-do spirit and devouring of any challenge you place before them a normal, everyday part of your classroom.
The truth is, they really can do it.
“This is what is expected.”
“You can do this.”
“You don’t need me.”
“I believe in you.”
No excuses. No rationalizations. No indulging, coddling, or handholding. No pointing fingers anywhere or at anyone.
But themselves.
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Such a great perspective. We talk about parenting with the saying “the first child’s made of glass, the second one of wood, and the third one of stone.” In this case, we’ve gotten to the point of “100% glass”. Letting kids have room to explore (especially to make mistakes) is all too often overlooked. We’re too likely to intervene, whether it’s for encouragement or correction. Thank you for highlighting it this way. And you should expand on it…
Thanks for your comments, Scott! Will do.
Great article! I especially appreciate your comment about never interfering with success. When we are successful (be it students, teachers, or anyone engaged in a task personally meaningful), it feels good. Success feels good. Let’s encourage independence in our students and not try to turn everything into a teachable moment.
Thanks Sally!
I love this! I am a highly trained preschool special education teacher, and there is a lot of subtle pressure to provide almost continual praise and “positive reinforcement”. In some settings, I have seen this carried to an extreme … loud cheering and “yay!!!” for every little thing. It truly becomes counterproductive over time.
This is excellent food for thought for the vacationing mind. I sometimes have a hard time not getting in there and helping. But when I actually succeed in “letting them be” the learning is more valuable. I have no doubt you’ve hit the nail on the head in this article and philosophy. Thanks for articulating and giving permission to step back and watch.
My thoughts exactly.
You’re welcome, Kristie.
I love this! I find myself also teaching parents it is ok to let kids go through this growing process!
I do the same.
I’m in full agreement with your article. However, there’s a big push I. Our district and school to have guided reading and guided math groups. My feelings are that it would be easy to fall into over helping during these times. What are your thoughts, and how would you handle this?
Hi Jessica,
I’ll put this on the list of future articles.
“The idea is for them to forget that you’re even there, to rely on themselves and their classmates, and to carry the full weight of responsibility”
I think it’s the right prescription with the wrong perspective. At least I don’t find it very inspiring to think of it as having children ‘carry the full weight of responsibility.” The point is to make learning and creating independently something students see as enjoyable and fun and something of which they are fully capable. This guarantees that these activities will always be a source of joy and inspiration and call to them.
One of the problems with helicopter parenting is that kids are overloaded with projects, instead of allowed to find their own creative social outlets, which of course explicitly implies that fun is involved – plenty of social fun while developing a range of social skills and strength that would otherwise atrophy.
You highlighted exactly what I do-jump in to tell them they are doing it right, encouraging the good behavior I expect, and tiring myself out. I HAVE to remember to let them go and do whatever it is that I had asked. Thank you so much for pointing out things I fail to see on my own. So helpfu!!!!
Michael, I understand the need to stay out of it in the moment, but is it counterproductive to say to the students at the end of class that you like how they worked hard today, and doesn’t it feel good to know what you can accomplish? My school is heavily invested in positive praise. I see how it diminishes students’ self reliance. Since I’m going to be the teacher that doesn’t hand out “tickets” for doing their jobs, I want to make sure that their work is reinforced. Thank you!
Hi Becky,
Not at all. For more on praise, please check out the Incentives & Praise category of the archive.
One way I’ve heard it said is that “the student should be the hardest working person in the classroom, not the teacher.”
I LOVE this !!
So true! Thank you! I learned this the hard way. I was watching this special needs kid who is Oppositionally Defiant. I gave him transition time and was doing what I said! 👍🤓. But then I said “Good job!” and he got ticked off threw another tantrum. Now I know why.
Excellent stimulus to completely alter/shift the reality of what TRUE teaching is. A real voice of wisdom here!!!
Very helpful! I love it
I really believe this, but I can’t do it when the principal is in the room or during evaluations. If I don’t circulate around the room constantly and speak to every student during an evaluation, I get marked down. :-/
Carol
Thanks Mike, for reinforcing this principle.
I wholeheartedly agree with it, and have used it in my classroom and had success with it. One question, though:
After teaching the students, explicitly, what you want from them, as you tell them to start working do you tell them that they can put up their hands if they have any questions? I feel that if I don’t say this, one or two students (or more) may sit there frustrated for the whole of the activity because they haven’t comprehended what to do. On the other hand, if I do say this I feel I could be fostering a climate of student reliance on their teacher. I teach second language learners in China by the way and some classes have low level English ability.
What do you suggest?
I think he’s saying that when students have the tools to be successful let them be. If your students truly don’t have the tools to complete what you need to teach them but once they can realistically do it let them work at it without interuption.
Thanks, Cathleen. Good answer.
Hi Gary,
My answer is too involved for the time and space we have here, but I’ll be sure to include this topic in a future article.
Thanks, Mike.
Fantastic article! I couldn’t agree you more, Michael. Student autonomy and the ability to think creatively on your own is so important in the classroom, I always insist on it. Keep the great articles coming!
I’ll do my best, Pamela!
I sincerely appreciate this piece in the sense that it has thrown sufficient light into the confusion of teacher centeredness and inquiry base learning.
The statement”In such an environment,supported by excellent instructions,students of all ages thrive”has clearly informed of what is expected of the teachers.
Thank you for adding value to my teaching experience.I encourage all teachers to always give clear instructions on what and how it should be done before leaving the students to independently carry out the activity.
It’s my pleasure, Ati.
I have struggled with this same issue in the classroom. I am not from an educational background but in healthcare. It has been a learning experience to teach what I love and have done as a career to students in high School. I found myself becoming that Helicopter Instructor in the Labs, worrying students would hurt themselves or someone else. When I realized that these students are not only capable of performing the skills in the lab, they are capable of running a Lab. I was then able to relax and enjoy watching how excited and confident these students became. My students have taken over the tours and are teaching our future Allied Health students the skills they have learned with great pride and enthusiasm for what they are studying. This also encourages a new generation of students to feel confident that they too can be successful in our classroom and they too can pursue healthcare.
This has become so clear to me over the past few years with my first graders, especially at recess. There seems to be so much tattling rather than learning to work things out. I believe we have created a culture of kids that need adults to navigate and make “fair” any slight the child might feel. I have been working to let success just be in my classroom even when it feels uncomfortable to me, like I should be doing something with them rather than just observing them doing! Thanks for the great article.
You’re welcome, Cathleen. Thanks for reading!
This is a great reminder of articles you’ve written about independence and motivation in the past. IT WORKS LIKE MAGIC over time.
I am interested to know more strategies for when you have students who really struggle with reading independently. What are some ways to help the ones who are truly struggling without creating learned helplessness or making them feel singled out? Is it best to let them sink or swim during independent practice and then use small group time to fill in the gap?
Hi Melissa,
We’ll cover this in a future article.
Validation for allowing students to find intrinsic motivation. Thank you!
You’re welcome, Angilyn.
Loved your article!! As Melinda specified, like to know more strategies to handle students who are unable to make a connection between what they have learned into practical life/real life situations. They need more of my presence when they are actually trying some math problems. But I want them to be more optimistic and confident. What needs to be done in such situations?
I LOVE this! I had a dependent, needy class last year, but looking back, I think I helped contribute to it! I have mostly the same kids this year and I plan on making some changes, this being among the first! I sometimes could do this, but often feel guilty when I’m not ‘doing anything’ with the kids, but it is such a great feeling when they are getting along, working hard together, and accomplishing tasks! Here’s to a successful year!
Thanks Elizabeth! No reason to feel guilty. It’s good teaching. 🙂
Michael, I enjoy your tips and tricks! Do you ever have videos of some of these things you talk about in action?
Hi Kathleen,
We had a video course available last year and may do some more in the future.
Hi Michael,
I was wondering what you might suggest when it comes to students who are below grade level? I teach 4th grade science and social studies. Last year I had 4 students who could not read or write beyond K level. In math and Reading, they had a SPED teacher to sit with them, but there is no one that comes during my block of time with them. On one hand, I believe there is learned helplessness. Teachers have always read to them and written for them. But on the other hand, these students genuinely cannot read and write grade level content (or even NEAR grade level content) on their own. To top it off, their confidence is bottomed out. They are so very peer conscious at this age and don’t want their classmates seeing them be read to, written for…treated differently. These particular students last year were motivated, paid attention, and poised their pencil each time ready to try. A split second later their eyes were searching for me to help them.
I firmly believe in student independence, letting them struggle a bit, and everything you have written here in this articles and others like it. But I am not sure about how to help these students who are just so far behind. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated greatly.
Hi Nikki,
Although rare, students who are completely lost, far behind, and still don’t respond when finally given world-class instruction and the freedom via independent practice to succeed are likely dealing with a severe emotional or learning disability. We’ll cover this topic in the future, but taking the steps needed to get a professional to test and determine the obstacle is a must.
Michael, what about positive narration? If it’s done in a sparing way and in a genuine manner would you say it’s a good habit? As a math teacher I had to really work hard on not pointing out mistakes and as an alternative I’ve learned to narrate positive things I’m seeing to the class as I walk around, but that seems to be in conflict with the ideas expressed in this article.
Hi Brent,
As typically defined, I’m not a fan. I’ll be sure to put this on the list of future articles.
I agree with this in theory for a suburban classroom. However, when students come from trauma and poverty, and they are very young, and nobody’s shown them much of anything, isn’t it our job to nurture them? What if we’re the first adults ever to tell them they are doing something right? What if nurturing and explicit instruction and reminders is exactly what they need?
Please don’t say you will address this later in another article, or that they need community support, or a special ed teacher, which we don’t have. I hear that all the time. If you’re in a classroom where a child gets frustrated and is about to throw a chair at you, what do you do?