Emotional outbursts, temper tantrums, yelling, lashing out.
Severe misbehavior like this needs to be dealt with differently than typical rule breaking.
How you respond to an aggressive child in the classroom goes a long way toward gaining control of the incident, keeping it from affecting other students, and lessening the chances of it happening again.
An Ineffective Response
Like parents who rush wide-eyed whenever a child falls and scrapes his knee, it’s a mistake to be in a hurry to intervene when students lose their cool.
The inclination to jump in and fix the problem can make matters worse. In response to an angry, verbally aggressive student, here is what you should never do:
Enforce a consequence.
You must hold students who act out in anger accountable—without a doubt—but not right away. You risk escalating the problem if you immediately try to pull them aside or put them in time-out.
Get angry.
Aggression on aggression is an explosive mix. Never yell, scold, or attempt to use the power of your authority to stop emotionally charged students.
Touch the student.
It’s common for teachers to place a hand on a student’s shoulder in an attempt to calm. But you don’t know what students are thinking in any given moment or what they’re capable of. It’s best to keep your distance.
Talk with the student.
Angry students are not open to conversation. So during and up to a couple of hours after the outburst, leave them alone.
An Effective Response
When a student acts out in anger in the classroom, here is what you should do:
Stay calm.
Keeping your emotions in check is the first step to gaining control of any situation.
Observe.
Stand firmly where you can observe the student in question and show the class you’re in control, but far enough away to keep an eye on all of your students.
Shield.
Your other students must not talk to or otherwise involve themselves with the angry student. Your first priority is to keep them safe, calm, and uninvolved.
Nothing.
Often, it’s best not to say or do anything. If the angry student stops the behavior, simply continue on with what you were doing—for now—allowing the student time to cool off.
Calm the student.
Rarely, you might have to use calming language and reassurance to settle the student down. Say, “Take it easy… I know you’re frustrated… We’ll talk about it later…” or words to that effect.
Wait.
Don’t speak to the angry student until he or she is in a calm emotional state. Continue with your day until you know the student is ready to listen.
Document.
As soon as you are able, document the student’s behavior. Write down everything said or done and interview all students near or involved in the incident. Make a copy for your records—muy importante.
Contact parents.
Severe misbehavior must be reported to parents. However, resist the urge to offer opinions or conclusions. Just give the facts. You do your job and let parents do—or not do—theirs.
Hold accountable.
After the student returns to a calm frame of mind, which could take a couple of hours, briefly explain how he or she will be held accountable.
Provide a stiff consequence.
Acting out in anger should result in an immediate escalation of consequences. A full day, in-class separation from the rest of the students is a good place to start.
Take care of it yourself.
Unless the behavior is physically aggressive, I’m not in favor of getting the principal involved. Involving administration weakens your authority and your ability to manage your classroom.
Take Your Time
You can’t go wrong taking your time in response to verbal aggression, tantrums, acting out in anger, and the like.
Waiting and observing allows you to accurately assess the behavior, keeps you from losing your cool, and clearly establishes you as the leader in control of the classroom.
Note: For students with recurring behavior problems, see the article series How To Turn Around Difficult Students.
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This is more of a question then a comment: What if you are teaching elementary kids, and you only see them for 40 minutes, and after they leave your classroom they won’t return again for a week or 2? I teach K-4 Art, and our schedule is kind of wacky. I have a kid who will throw temper tantrums right a clean up time. His class leaves, my next class is walking in my door as we are trying to escort the still screaming kid out the door. I won’t get to see him calm down. And does it really make sense to give a first grader a consequence almost 2 weeks later? He most likely doesn’t even remember the incident…and reminding him of it will only cause him to flip out again.
Hi Beth,
Seeing students so infrequently gives you a disadvantage. It’s difficult to build leverage and influence with students you don’t see every day. However, it’s not okay to throw a tantrum during your art class, and you absolutely must hold the student accountable. You can do this a couple of different ways:
1. If you want it to happen immediately, then inform the classroom teacher that the child will spend the next recess (or lunch or both or whatever is appropriate given the behavior that prompted the tantrum) with you–literally with you and not in a time-out area.
2. Go to the child’s classroom and let him know (after settling down) that he will miss the first half of the next art lesson. First graders can remember this far in advance, but if you’re concerned about it, simply remind the child a day or so beforehand. Also, make your next art lesson especially fun–ham it up and let him see what he’s missing and feel the weight of his poor choice the previous week.
Whatever you choose to do, a phone call or letter home to parents detailing the child’s behavior and explaining your plan for accountability is essential.
Michael
As a consequence, you suggested “full-day in-class separation from the rest of the students”. I’m not sure what this would look like. For elementary, would this be in your classroom but in a “satellite” desk separated from others? I’m laid off and subbing right now and I’m about to take over a K-1 combo through the end of the year. And what about middle school? I did a long stretch of mostly eighth grade earlier this year – would you do this the next day during their class period?
Hi Carolyn,
Yes, you’re exactly right on both accounts.
Michael
Hi Michael,
Like Beth, I teach Craft/ Handwork 75 mins per week to children from Kindy to Grade 6. I’m a new teacher but still hopeful I can set and engender appropriate behaviour in my room. The school’s policy for students having received 3 warnings is being sent to another class (unfortunately outsourcing my discipline at that point) but I have had a student refuse to go (which also undermines my authority to the rest of the class). A senior teacher has said I should send him a messenger to come and collect the student (being a small school, the full time teachers hold more sway than the specialists). If you have a suggestion for my dilemma I’d be grateful. Thank you for your work, your book and your website is absolutely what I need when starting out. Kind Regards, Stephanie
Hi Stephanie,
I would ask your principal permission to create your own classroom management plan. This would be the best option. By sending him to someone else, you’re weakening your authority/power. However, If this isn’t possible, and you have to follow the school’s plan, then when a student refuses to go to time-out you must have a further consequence. A letter home would be my choice (see last week’s article Why A Letter Home Is An Effective Consequence). As soon as the student refuses to go, I wouldn’t wring my hands over it, argue with him, or try to convince him to go. I’d just hand him the letter.
Michael
Thank you very much. This is very useful for me. I am clinical psychologist at international school in Egypt (American system).
Great Sanaa! I’m glad you’re a Smart Classroom Management reader.
Michael
I think you are wrong in not using the resource of a principal. At the very least they should be notified and given a copy of the documentation. Angry parents often end up in a principal’s office not a classroom, and they should be informed of the severe misbehavior. Principals are a needed part of an effective behavior management team. Specifically for the type of severe behavior you are describing.
Hello,
I teach pre-k and I have a child who consistently has angry outbursts and throws chairs, jumps on/off desks and start to throw things off shelves. Any advice on how to effectively handle the situation?
Thank you!
Hi Kristen,
I would handle it exactly as written above. You may also want to read How To Handle Temper Tantrums, Emotional Outbursts, And Other Outrageously Aggressive Behavior.
Michael
hi,, i’m going to be a teacher soon.. seeing how students acts at my teachers previously at my school make me worry how am i gonna take my class one day..this gonna help a lot..thanks !
Hi this is very informative and interesting ….I would like to ask though how does a preschool teacher handle students who don’t like sharing not even at break time while playing on the swing or even in class and not wanting to share blocks or a toy which results in the child crying and hitting the other student..Thanks in advance for the response.
Hi Devica,
Presumably the blocks and toys belong to the classroom, of which all students are a part. Thus, if a child refuses to share them, there must be a consequence.
Michael
Do you have the same suggestions for an emotionally disturbed student who screams in class and calls you a b**** for ignoring him? I taught middle school last year and ignoring the student only made it worse.
Hi Tera,
Yes, I do. When you get a chance, please reread the article. I’m not suggesting that you ignore the student.
:)Michael
Hi Michael,
I teach KG-1, and I have 2 problem children.
1 hits other students on daily basis, and the other one, never listens, jumps on tables, and keeps saying “no” to me whenever I try to calm him down.
The school admins know whats going on, and the furthest action they took was telling me that they won’t accept them in the school next year and to deal.
I have bright students in the class room, but these 2 kids ruin it for them.
Do you have any pointers for me?
Thanks!
Hi Boud,
I recommend reading through the Classroom Management Plan, Rules & Consequences, Time-out, and Difficult Students categories of the archive in their entirety. If you have specific questions after that, please email me. I’m happy to help.
:)Michael
Hi Michael,
I have a color chart where “red” is the lowest for the worst behavior. When a child has an angry outburst/temper tantrum do you recommend moving their color to “red” immediately? It’s 3 steps from “blue” which is the top color for best behavior. Thank you.
Hi Christine,
Indeed, severe behavior warrants time-out and parents contacted.
Michael
NIMH Director Thomas Insel has been hard at work trying to map out the brain and the genes that drives some of these negative behaviors. While I think many of your suggestions would work for a majority of the students, there are students(often classified as emotionally disturbed) who keep going through the revolving door of behavior/consequences. I think these kids would be better served with medical intervention in addition to behavioral intervention.
I have been a teacher in Australia for 12 years now and I do believe there is a point when a child can be removed from the classroom and sent to the principal. The principal is a symbol of how bad the student has behaved, not a demise of their respect for you as a teacher. In many cases if you mention that the Principal will need to be informed, many students realise they have gone too far. I would think in particular if a student has use very bad language and requires a suspension of some sort, a teacher can recommend this but can’t reinforce it, it has to come from the Principal. I don’t support sending every case to the Principal but some situations do require the principal involvement and they are there to support the teacher in difficult situations. I have had to request assistance in some instances and i will do it again. If a student in my class refuses a time out, then i would take their play time away. I wouldn’t send a letter home, unless the behaviour was repeated. I would also suggest a phone call to the parents rather than a letter or at least a follow up call to make sure the parent got the letter – some students won’t give a letter to their parents especially if they know it doesn’t say something good about their behaviour.
In relation to ignoring a student for swearing at you, I don’t entirely agree with that. Sometimes ignoring a student can just pose a challenge for them. What else can I say to tick teacher off? What will it take to get teacher to respond to me? When I have been in these situations, I don’t react, I give the student a blank face and say something like, ” When you are calm we can discuss this.” When they are calm, we discuss it and also discuss the consequences for their choice of behaviour. If a student doesn’t calm down, then I will ask for reinforcement and an executive teacher will remove the student. Which I suppose goes against your philosophy. However, if i don’t remove the student, it opens up the possibility for other students to copy-cat the behaviour. If not in that instance, but another instance. What I do want to share with though, which helps me with my teaching, is above anything else, NEVER TAKE IT PERSONALLY! Don’t take what i child yells at you personally. I don’t and the kids will realise this as time goes on. I don’t react in their presence, as it gives them a sense of power of you. If a student tells me they hate me, I say something like, that’s a shame, but i like you and I think you are……. a positive point about their abilities. I find this more often than not works for me.
You advise me to wait and observe as the student has their episode, but frankly, I am trying to teach and they are taking up my class time. How long should I stand there and observe while a student acts out exactly?
Hi Adam,
When you get a chance, please reread the article. Once you ensure the safety of your class, you’ll move along with your day.
Michael
Interesting read. Thanks!
Hi Michael ,
I teach high school, I am the year 8 co-ordination and there is a student in this grade who gets berry a grand other students come to saying that she is very angry because of something and she hits people when she’s angry, I try and ask her what’s wrong but she avoids eye contact with all the teachers ( all the time not just when asked about something ) but when I ask her what’s wrong she doesn’t look at me and she nods her head and says nothing’s wrong,another student came to me about her sayi that they think she has anger issues but she doesn’t like talking about things and how she’s feeling any tips ?
Hi David,
I would need to know a lot more about the student in order to give you accurate advice. I wouldn’t want to risk steering you the wrong way.
Michael
I was wondering did you have any tips for me. I work in a before and after school program at a local school and there are three children from the same family that can get very bad. I have seen a lot of aggression anger. Also I have seen physical aggression by one of the kids towards another student. This aggression with the specific student can go anywhere from saying that another student can’t play with them because they are annoying, or getting physical such as using hands or feet to the other student if telling them doesn’t work. Also I have heard foul language used as well. The student has been made to set aside for a certain amount of time many different times by different teachers over the couple years in this before and after school program, and the student has also been written up many times. The parents are told as well but nothing has worked yet. I would like to try to talk to this child and get them to understand some things such as the fact that they are a role model for the younger kids. They need to be someone that the younger kids can look up to. I also want to remind them that they were that young once and tell them that if they get older and a former student from the program whom they always picked on came to them, how would they want to be remembered and what were they want the other student to say about them? I care deeply for all of these kids and I want so much to reach this kid hoping that if I start with one maybe the other two in the family might follow. Please let me know any tips you have.