The lowly fist bump, offered as students file out of your classroom, is arguably the easiest way to build rapport.
It’s also super effective.
Here’s why:
It cleans the slate.
No matter what happens during class, no matter how strongly you challenge your students or raise your standards, the end-of-day fist bump says that it’s all in the past.
There are no grudges. You may continue to ask more of them, day after day, but rest assured, there are never any hard feelings. The fist bump wipes it all clean.
It requires reciprocation.
Although offered and never forced, a fist bump requires students to reach out toward you. It’s an act of faith and reciprocation.
It’s a choice they make showing that they’re buying into what you’re selling and asking of them. It’s acknowledgement that you’re all on the same team.
It includes eye contact and a smile.
Eye contact, especially when accompanied by a smile, makes a strong connection. It recognizes the student and let’s them know that you see them as a person and individual.
It also enhances your likability and confirms your choice to see the best in your students. In other words, it requires you to accept and care for them equally.
It ensures you reach every student.
Some students are naturally quiet. Some you rarely need to speak to, especially if you have a large class size.
The end-of-period fist bump ensures that you make a quick check-in with every student every day. That one or two-second bond means a lot to them and, you’ll find, to you too.
It grows over time.
The first time you offer a fist bump can feel awkward, for both you and them. But over time, it becomes natural.
The camaraderie, you’ll discover, won’t be just between you and your students, but it will grow among them as well. They’ll begin to fist bump each other—often and for the same reasons.
It lowers stress.
A simple tap of the knuckles, like all touch, decreases cortisol and increases serotonin. It relaxes the central nervous system and makes us feel good.
Combined with the message “I see you,” it becomes indispensable—so much so that if you forget or are busy with something, your students will go out of their way to make sure you bump fists.
Some Tips
Smart phones and social media have had a negative impact on the frequency of physical contact among friends and family. You can see it at any airport.
The pandemic has only made it worse. Yet, touch is so healthy. It’s vital to our well being and innate to our desire for human connection.
For teachers, fist bumps, hand shakes, and high fives are the only appropriate methods of touch.
But the fist bump stands alone because students still think it’s cool. It’s evolved, however, into less of a knuckle “punch” and more of a tap of the area on the bottom of the hand between the little finger and the wrist.
However you do it, just do it.
Every day, as soon as the dismissal bell rings, stand at your door, smile, make eye contact, and offer your fist to every student.
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I do understand but feel it’s a bit awkward for middle school students
Try it. It will work great with middle school students.
I can confirm that it works fantastically with middle school students. I use it with my middle school math students.
Middle schoolers like the fist bump. They will even initiate it sometimes if they like you.
What a great idea! I’ll try it.
If fist bumps seems too potentially violent, try Elbow Bumps!
I created a new way to connect When the pandemic hit and still continue it. I do hi5 feet. We kick our furthest leg from each other behind us and connect that way.
Agreed- thank you for small things that make a big difference! I read every week 🙂
Ok, so I don’t know how to phrase it… we “dab up” at the end of the day as they’re lined up for dismissal. The kids kept asking, “Dab me up.” I did it wrong for the first five stydents! I used to do fist bumps, but then they kept “snailing” me. Which is actually even more engaging because I feel like the trust me enough to tease me. I’m 40. It feels weird to do trending things at first, but it shows we still relate! I love this article, Michael!
My 4th grade students just taught me this . . . also they have a “Wakanda” handshake they just taught me as well.
I like this idea a lot, but I teach at a girls religious school where male teachers are not allowed to touch students (even handshakes). Maybe I could do an air high 5, but curious if anyone in a similar situation has ideas that have worked well? Thx!
Have you tried ‘air-hugs’? You give yourself a hug and they hug themselves back. I also did the ‘Wakanda Forever’ salute when the movie first came out. Now that the new one is out, I think I will try that one again!
the magic snap, someone has a great idea or says something totally on target and the teacher starts snapping and the whole class joins in. If they are younge you can take your two fingers (pointer and middle) to your eyes and then back towards them as the hip I see you even from afar without saying anything, but smile or they will think they are in trouble. post it notes on desks with smiley faces or a hand for highfives also works, but nothing personal on the note or the parents will get freaked. positive messages on tests go along way with funny charachters at the end – they all look for those. Good Luck – they are fortunate to have a respectful caring teacher.
In that case, I’d do something like a salute, invisible hat tip, snap+ finger point, or a little bow. Alternate them so you don’t get bored. If all else fails, just teach them to always make eye contact (I do the two fingers motion and say “eye contact” if they don’t), nod, and say good bye in different languages.
Spanish = Adios.
Italian = Arrivederci.
French = Au Revoir.
Portuguese = Adeus.
German = Auf Wiedersehen.
Japanese = Sayōnara.
Russian = Do svidaniya.
Korean = Annyeong.
I do fist bumps or high 5 (they choose) every Friday afternoon with my grade 2 students. Last week when there was no school on Friday they requested it Thursday afternoon. It’s a small thing, but it does end the week nicely. Other students walking past in the hall ask for a fist bump too.
My kids would probably love to do a fist bump with me. They will have to teach me how to do one!
So refreshing! Thank you for su much support! Your advice is very helpful.
I find that the easiest way to “break through” to young children especially K-3 is to smile directly at them having eye contact, The more you can do this throughout the day, the better!!!
I have 5th grade and I do this every day. Every. Day. What gets me is the one who might be mad at me grudgingly offering a fist.😂 I say things like “tomorrow”, “have a great weekend “, or you had an amazing day today!
Michael Linsin! You rock – I always come back to you – you make SUCH GREAT SENSE!
Will try it 🙂 Teaching ESL – primary level – so this will work!
Take care!
Marika from Quebec, Canada
I teach Art k-5 on a cart. I leave their classroom after every period. I was thinking maybe I’ll walk around the room and fist bump before I leave?
This is something that I do with my students and it works like magic, but your article put into words the reasons why it is magic and so healthy for both the student and teacher. I never thought about it, it just happened naturally, but I appreciate your pointing it out to me so I don’t stop doing it. Thank you very much.
I teach computer classes where the students carry their Chromebooks to and from class. Any suggestions on an alternative as they walk out with their hands full?
Elbow bump
Great stuff, will try this, thanks!
I love this! Music and band teacher here, I stood at the door to air-high 5 as students left my class during the pandemic when we were not playing instruments. Now, back to playing, I find those class start and end times busy with fixing instruments, unsticking mouthpieces, handing out scores, etc. Not sure I can do the fist bump every class but I will make a point to bring it back and do it when I can. Thanks for the reminder.
Every Monday I start the week off with my high school Early Childhood Education students by having a morning meeting. I greet them at the door and they have 4 options to choose from weekly as to how we greet one another. Some require physical touch like a fist bump, high five, elbow bump, foot bump (we had a discussion about these and they all agreed to these and said they wouldn’t be uncomfortable). Other greetings don’t require physical touch, such as bust a move, thumbs up, salute, wave, smile, verbal greeting. I feel the smile and verbal greeting just naturally happen even if they choose another option. My juniors and seniors love this and look forward to it. We have incorporated this into the weekly time that they get to teach preschoolers…before the preschoolers come into our lab classroom, a high school student greets them. A positive rapport with students is CRUCIAL if you want to teach them!